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No Stomach For Cancer

Thursday, August 15, 2013

We do cancer together.

Ours is a family affair, together, the three of us, each have our own unique journey with cancer to deal with.
 Yes, much has happened since this time last year! First, we found out that my husbands two cancers were in remission! Yeah, did we celebrate! But not for long! Getting thru Follicilar Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma, stage 4 and Stomach Cancer (adenocarcinoma stage 2 a) turned out to be enough of a high to get us through the devastating news that our beautiful Blue Tic Coonhound, Savannah, had nasal carcinoma. She was given 2 months to live..you know, no one should ever give another human a date of demise....it's just wrong...they don't get a sneak peak at the date of death tag  that's tied to our toe! It also gave us enough hope to get thru what was our next shocking news. My MRI showed a tumor in my right peretal/occipital lobe of my brain. Brain surgery on November 7th of 2012, and a lovely resection later, showed that my tumor was an oligodendroglioma. (i remembered the name because God is right in the middle of it ) A stage 2 brain cancer. Even just writing this out is enough to make my head hurt! I'm going to sleep now, just fell asleep! Blessings to you and yours!To be continued tomorrow.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Change, change and more change.

10:30 and I'm already in bed. Its been a long, kind of heartwarming day and Im exhausted! Suddenly, and out of the blue, restlessness takes over. I play a few rounds of Candy Crush....boring! So I decided to look up my old blog.  The Weeping Jar. It was a little painful reading a few entries, partially because it was painful living thru those early days of my husbands cancer treatment, but also because, well.... I couldn't keep it up! I had really wanted to become a blogger. I dreamed of documenting this part of our life, hoping that it might help me because it's such a cool avenue to let it all out, in, and secretly hoping that it might help other cancer patients and their caregivers too! Just knowing that someone else can get thru it all, without too many war wounds, really does boost the spirits. I had learned that reaching out to others when your going thru it yourself, makes life easier in many ways.
Easier, if it works with your current situation....easier if you can keep up with it, easier if it lifts your spirit. For me at this time last year it wasn't doing any of that. It was not easy, and so I had to let it brew on the back burner.
Ok, now I'm really tired so, I'm off to sleep! More to come! Blessings to you and yours!

Monday, August 6, 2012

O'DAT!

I haven't blogged here since June 8th. Wow, where did the time go? I guess I needed to go out and get more material on which to blog about.  First things first, I need to comment on my failure to keep the promise of blogging for 28 days straight. I will keep my comment brief....I failed. Yup, it's just that simple! I since have found a great acronym that will help me decide if committing myself to something is realistic for me. It's beautiful, rather silly and oh so helpful in all area's of my life. It's O.'D.A.T. Now, when something comes up I ask myself, using the Promise of blogging for 28 days as an example, "Self, do I have "the opportunity" to be able to blog for 28 days straight?" then, "do I have the "desire" to blog for 28 days straight?" Then, "do I have the "ability" to blog for 28 days straight?" And finally, "do I have the "time" to blog for 28 days straight?" If I answer "no" to any of these answers, then the assignment in question is clearly not for me to do at that given time. If I had asked myself these questions way back in May when I started to attempt the 28 day run, I would have gotten only 3 yes's. I had the Opportunity, the Desire and the Time, just not the Ability "yet". I think it's going to take awhile to make a skilled blogger out of me, am I willing to run that theory through the O.'D.A.T.? You bet'cha! And I will get four strong yes's!!!

Friday, June 8, 2012

MyPromise Day 1 "Grrrrrr."

Yes, Day 1 again! It's really beginning to frustrate me all the little things that I allow to get in the way of me getting my blog on. Sometimes it's simply me not having the drive to do it, sometimes, there is so much life in my day that I'm too tired to come over here and blog, sometimes there is nothing going on except watching my husband suffer through his latest side effects, or ailments that are causing him to suffer in pain, the grief I feel at times is crippling. BUT! Determined I am to blog for 28 days straight, darn it!  So....grrrrrrr.....it's going to happen!

So, what's been going on here? My husband has been dealing with excruciating joint pain, bone pain and back pain...at one point last weekend it was an 8 on the pain scale. He has a lot of tolerance for pain, so 8 for him would be 15 for anyone else. It kept him up most of that weekend... breaks my heart to not be able to help him. I tried heat, massage, he rocked in bed with his knees pulled up under his chest...why does he have to keep having such extreme hardships? Why? It makes me angry....grrrrrrr! This week, it's not as bad, probably a 4 to 5, but before he can get his day going he has to allow the tylenol to kick in a bit. It's 3 and it hasn't kicked in yet.  It will, early evenings seem to be best for him.

For me, I'm finally on vacation for the summer. Middle School is officially over for the summer and I am one happy camper! I'm starting the summer off with 4 to 5 straight days of babysitting the grandkids. It can be work, but I have so much fun with them! They give me so much joy, God knew what he was doing when he gave me Grandkids! LOL Speaking of which, I'm off to get ready to go hang out with them!




Monday, June 4, 2012

MyPromise Day 4 "Countdown to Summer Vacation"

Today was day 4 in my countdown to summer vacation! Everyone, kids, teachers, staff, all are either stressed out with all the last minute things to do, or jumping off the walls with excitement. It's fun to watch these middle schoolers as we get close to the end of the school year, some it seems have no more brain cells, others thank goodness, step up to the plate and show that they are ready to move up a grade! I'm a Special Ed Aide in a Social Thinking Class where we address the needs of the Asperger teens. This has been my very favorite year. This job, even with it's more difficult days has truly been a gift to me in this cancer walk with my husband. It's allowed me to get out of self, and help these amazing students of ours, plus, as a bonus I've gotten to create a book of poetry, make movies, create new documents, help with art projects, and learn. I love it! Today was another hard day for my hubby, he did get a few more hours of sleep, which makes a big difference, but he feels achy all over and thinks that he may have a cold coming on. His temperature is normal, I pray that this passes. Tomorrow he gets a CT scan on his kidneys, the urologist wants a good look at the stones, or the smudge he sees there. Praying for good news. Will share the results tomorrow. Good night!

Sunday, June 3, 2012

MyPromise Day 3 " Rinse and Repeat"

I feel like a Zombie today, walking around just doing whatever absolutely has to get done, which means laundry, feeding us, our dog, cat, fish, plants and the least favorite... poop duty!

My hubby had another very rough night sleep, which meant that so did I, plus, as a bonus I got to be very concerned about him. He didn't get any sleep at all because the joint pain was soo bad, at 10 he  climbed out of bed and sank into his easy chair, watched some racing and finally fell out at 2pm. This will pass, this will pass, this will pass...is my matra for the day. I will be heading to the bedroom very early today so I can get some sleep for tomorrow's early rising. I need to get back on track with sleep, exercise and journaling...all of which have been out of the picture this entire weekend.

Oh, while cooking brunch I noticed this very cool thing going on with my glasses...here's the photo!
It's screaming for a caption!! Got a good one, let me know!

Saturday, June 2, 2012

MyPromise Day 2 "Not in a good place"

I was gone all day yesterday with my grandkids and when I got home (1:30am) I told my hubby good night and went right to bed. Around 4 he climbed into bed and all the rest of the night he kicked and rocked, his joint pain was through the roof. On the scale of 1-10 he called it an 8. "This is just hell," he said as he struggled to get comfortable. Nothing I tried to do made him comfortable, massaging the back of the knees didn't work, a heating pad didn't work, the tylenol didn't work, praying didn't work. Somewhere around 8am I fell out and then woke at 10. At 1pm I left to help some friends get set up for a big party they were throwing and came back an hour later. He hadn't gotten out of bed yet. It was 2pm. A little later he came out to the living room, he managed to get a few hours of sleep.